Flutter

Let me be color.
Let me be a whirling splash of bright,
a wind driven tumble fly,
dancing between nectar and dew.
Let me be weightless carefree beauty.
Let me be free.
Let me forget.

For if I stand too long,
the memories crawl from
just below the shallow surface
and I recall those endless days
of perpetual supplication,
crawling alone among the low
driven by a desperate hunger.

And then that dark night, that darkest hour,
when all the world caved in
and I became both
hunger and the prey.
When I dissolved
and fought for light
and breath and self.

In dreams I died that night
and I don't want to remember.
I don't want to remember.

So let me spread bold wings of light,
Let me be flit and flutter.
Let me be giddy with shimmering laughter,
without longing, without hunger
without memories.
Grant me sunny, playful days
and dreamless nights.